What do you get if you cross a centipede and a parrot? A walkie talkie!
What do you get if you cross a centipede and a chicken? Enough drumsticks to feed an army!
Why was the centipede dropped from the insect football team? He took too long to put his boots on!
What is worse than an alligator with toothache? A centipede with athlete's foot!
What has 50 legs but cant walk? Half a centipede!
What goes 99-clonk, 99-clonk, 99-clonk? A centipede with a wooden leg!
Why was the centipede late? Because he was playing 'This Little Piggy' with his kids!
What did the sexist male centipede say to his friend when he saw the female centipede pass? There's a nice pair of legs, pair of legs, pair of legs, pair of legs ....