I kept wondering why the ball was getting bigger. And then it hit me.
Laughter is the best medicine except for treating diorrhea
The Miss Universe contest must be rigged - it's always a human being that wins
If you don't believe God has a sense of humour, just look in the mirror.
I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory: all I did was take a day off ...
Okay, I can't spell Armageddon. It's not the end of the world ...
A man goes to his doctor and says, "I think I'm a moth." "You don't need me," replies the doctor, "you need a psychologist." "I know," says the man, "but I was passing, and your light was on."