Q: How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
Q: How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A1: None of your darn business!
A2: 50. 50? Yeah 50; it's in the contract.
Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Two, one to hold the giraffe, and the other to fill the bathtub with brightly colored machine tools.
Q: How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Three. One to get the bulb and two to get the phone number to dial one of their subordinates to actually change it.
Q: How many IBM types does it take to change a light bulb?
A: 100. Ten to do it, and 90 to write document number GC7500439-0001, Multitasking Incandescent Source System Facility, of which 10% of the pages state only "This page intentionally left blank", and 20% of the definitions are of the form "A ...... consists of sequences of non-blank characters separated by blanks".
Q: How many graduate students does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Only one, but it takes nine years.
Q: How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Only one, but they get three technical reports out of it.
Q: How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two. One to assure that everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
Q: How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: That's not funny!!!
Q. How many flies does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Two, but don't ask me how they got in there.